


Kaleidoscope

by monidon



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Space, Character Death Implied, F/M, Gen, Male Bonding, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-13
Updated: 2015-02-13
Packaged: 2018-03-12 04:19:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3343445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monidon/pseuds/monidon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A routine spacewalk goes horribly wrong and Erwin is forced to reflect back on his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kaleidoscope

**Author's Note:**

> This was my entry for Day 1 of EruMika Week on tumblr. It kind of turned into unintentional EruRi bonding, though. Heavily inspired by Ray Bradbury’s “Kaleidoscope” (A short story I HIGHLY recommend.)
> 
> Sads ahead!

The ocean breeze cooled his heated skin as he lay in bed that morning. White sheets lay wrinkled under two pairs of bare feet. Just outside the open window, the chime of translucent, stringed, seashells clinked against one another like porcelain cups; the rising sun hitting their dyed shells reflected a jumble of colors twirling over the two naked forms. Two chests, one facing the grey ceiling, the other to the open window, rising and falling in time with one another. Slow caresses of large, work-hardened fingers drawing random shapes on pale, smooth, skin.

“You’re overthinking things again.” Came the voice beside him; soft and laced with sleep.

“Hm?” He lifted his brow in amusement, pretending to avoid the oncoming conversation.

“I know that look.” His bed partner chided, twisting her body to lightly tap the tip of his nose. “Stop it.”

He rolled over, tangling their legs together and wrapping his arms around her in a gentle embrace. While his right arm was used as her makeshift pillow, he used his left to find rest over her protruding stomach, covering as much of it in his hand as he could as if to shield the unborn life within from the world outside.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked, lightly rubbing the muscles on his forearm. He tensed slightly before relaxing under her touch. Not even his friends, who had known him since grade school, could read his every action, every look, as well as she could. It almost came as a relief when one word, touch, or action of hers instantly alleviated the dark thoughts clouding his mind.

“Mmm… nothing.” He replied lazily, trying to stay in the present by burying his nose in her hair. “And everything.”

She reached down and laced her fingers with his before bringing his knuckles to her lips. “You’re going to make a good father.”

She could feel him smiling against the back her head. Yes, she was all too perceptive.

“I love you.” He whispered, thumbing the silver band around her finger. The dark, mussed, strands of her hair tickled his nostrils. On any other morning, he would have already been up and dressed for the day. But today was different. Today he needed to hold her a little longer, breathe in her unique, musky, scent a little more deeply.

“It’s time to wake up.”

“No, not yet.” He tightened his hold on her.

“I love you, Erwin.”

_“Erwin…ca-n you h-ear me…?”_

“No, Mikasa. _Please._ ” He squeezed his eyes shut, afraid to open them. Afraid to lose her.

“Erwin, please wake up.”

_“Fucking- ERWIN!”_

A loud gasp, a rapid beeping of alarms in his com, and nothing but the darkness of space around him ripped him from her.

“What?” he breathed, almost confused.

And suddenly it all came back to him.

He was falling, a mere speck of dust hurtling through space like nothing more than a meteoroid.

_“Christ, Erwin. Are you there? Can you hear me?”_

The disembodied voice of someone from mission control, _‘No, not_ someone _, Levi,’_ cracked through the speakers of his headset. How he still managed communicate with him, he didn’t know. The blast caught everyone by surprise. One minute he was on a routine spacewalk, the next… A rogue asteroid. Then nothing but screams cut off one by one as a maelstrom of metal and rock scattered about, destroying everything in their paths.

He looked around him, hoping for some sign of life, anything, but there was nothing. Not even a visible chunk of metal from his ship. Just him alone in the vast darkness of space.

“Yeah, Levi, I’m here.” He finally breathed, remembering his voice was still calling out to him.

_“Fuck, Erwin.”_ The man sighed, relieved. _“I thought we lost you. Can you see the ship?”_

“No, it’s just me. Everything else…”

He heard Levi mutter a curse under his breath.

_“Do you know your position? Can you see anything?”_

A pause.

“I can see the Earth… I’ll probably be home within the hour.”

His speaker was silent for a moment. He thought he lost communication until,

_“Shit.”_

He chuckled that same throaty chortle he always used when no other reaction would do, albeit a bit strained now. “Yeah, shit.”

_“No point in sticking to protocol now.”_ Levi sighed loudly. Erwin could hear something slam on the other end. _“I’ve always hated you, Erwin. Wanted to kill you the moment I met you.”_

“What?”

_“Yeah, it’s bad enough you were the one selected to go up, but you had to go and knock up my niece, too.”_

“Levi…”

_“Yeah, yeah. I know you married her, put a roof over her and the brat’s head and all, but I hate your goddamn guts.”_

“No you don’t.” he responded with a knowing smile, “If I remember correctly, on our wedding day you said, and I’m mostly paraphrasing, if it were a choice between me and ‘that Kirstein shithead,’ you’d pick me any day.”

A light laughter could be heard over the other end. _“Yeah… I’m sorry. I just-"_

“It’s okay, Levi. I know.”

_“No, I don’t think you do. Mikasa, the kid… me— I didn’t want you near her, let alone start a family. I promised my cousin_ I’d _be the one to take care of her, but, fuck, I was so glad you were the one who brought that smile outta her.”_

The confession was a punch to the gut, even after the fact that he knew Levi never really disapproved of the two.  

The day he and Mikasa came out with their relationship, he knew Levi was more than a little annoyed, but he could see the sincerity in the shorter man’s blue eyes when he gave them his blessing after a lengthy stream of offensive epithets. When they announced their upcoming nuptials, a handful of people were there to witness the rare smile that crept upon his face. Only two actually knew better than to slink back in fear. And later, when they told him of their coming addition, he all but cried after it was revealed they’d be naming it after him.

“Levi, are you there?”

_“Yeah, I’m still here.”_

“Recording?”

_“Of course.”_

“I… I need you to take care of Mikasa. She’s strong, she can-- she can handle herself, but--“

_“Christ, Erwin. Who the hell do you think you’re talking to? Or did you forget I raised the brat for eighteen years before you showed up?”_

“No, it’s just-- the little one. He’s barely five. He’s going to have questions. And you know how she gets on her parent’s anniversary… She’s going to need you more than ever.”

Silence.

“Levi, _please_.” He hardly ever begged, especially to Levi, but he needed the assurance. He needed to know the only people he could honestly say he loved more than anything else in the universe were going to be alright without him.

_“Yeah, yeah._ I know _.”_ The voice on the other end finally spoke up. _“…It’s going to be strange.”_

“I know. I’m sorry.”

_“Fuck, no. Don’t apologize. Don’t you dare apologize, Erwin.”_

“Tell her I love her. So much.”

_“As if I need to.”_

“No, really. Please tell her.”

_“You know I will.”_

“And hug the little one for me. Please.”

_“I will, Erwin.”_

“I’m glad I met you, Levi.”

He could hear a snort on the other end.

“Truly. You’ve always been more than a friend to me. I’m very thankful for that.”

_“Well, you’ve technically been family the past several years, but I’m glad I met you, too.”_

“Thank you. For everything.”

_“Yeah… Anything else?”_

Erwin was silent for a moment. The Earth was getting bigger and bigger. He knew he’d lose contact any moment now.

“I can see the sunlight reflecting on the ocean. It looks like early morning… God, it’s beautiful.”

_“Yeah, it’s almost 7:30 here.”_

“They’ll be up eating breakfast, getting ready for the day.”

_“Mini me taking his morning shit.”_

Erwin chuckled. “Yeah.”

_“It was an honor, Erwin.”_

“A damn fine view.”

7:30 a.m.

Out of the corner of his eye, a small boy watched as streaks of light fell to the earth over the glassy ocean outside the kitchen window.

“Mommy, look at the stars!” he cried excitedly, pointing towards the sky.

Two sets of eyes, one grey, the other a brilliant blue, looked up. Silent.

“Daddy will be home soon.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. I am sorry for any feels this may have caused. Truly. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think! Comments are very much appreciated! (And if I tagged anything wrong, PLEASE let me know so I can fix things accordingly.)


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